The Social Dilemma: How Technology Is Controlling You

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Insight from leading professionals on how to better protect your time.

What’s the first thing you do when you wake up in the morning? Not long ago, brushing your teeth or eating breakfast would have been the answer. But as far back as 2013, a study found that 80% of smartphone users check their phones within 15 minutes of waking up.

Do you find it increasingly difficult to put your phone down? Are you helplessly wasting hours and days scrolling through Facebook videos that you don’t even want to watch? If I asked you to, could you take a break from social media?

Chances are the answer is no.

Acknowledging this radical, and potentially harmful shift in human day to day behavior over the past 10 years, Netflix’s “The Social Dilemma” sets out to explore why this shift occurred. More importantly, it aims to show viewers they are being manipulated by tech giants to act in this way.

Comparing social media to a drug, the documentary draws on views and discussions from social historians and tech experts. Most notably:

• Tim Kendall (Former president of Pinterest and ex-director of monetization at Facebook).
• Chamath Palihapitiya (Former Vice President of Facebook and CEO of Social Capital).
• Tristan Harris (Former design ethicist at Google, and co-founder of the Center for Humane Technology).

At its core, the Social Dilemma explores three main themes: technology addiction, how tech firms are reverse engineering our psychology, and how they are doing so to monetize our time.

Let’s discuss some of the key lessons from their research.

The Addiction Factor

Before getting into how tech giants use your data and information to lure you in, it’s important to note the framework of websites like Facebook and X revolves around getting us addicted. And, according to Tristan Harris, they do so by designing their platforms with Las Vegas slot machine principles in mind.

The psychology behind why slot machines are so addictive was first studied by the psychologist B. F. Skinner. In his experiments, pigeons pecked a key for food, and when the food came at random (rather than on every peck), the pigeons pecked more often.

In short, a win on a slot machine offers instant gratification; and when you pull the lever, you could immediately be better off. Of course, you are bound to lose on most occasions, but these machines are programmed to let you win every once in a while. Every time you press the lever, you believe you could win. The addiction of slot machines relies on the expectation of rewards, and the thought you could win big at any moment, so you keep playing, even when you’re losing.

According to Harris, tech giants tailored their platforms to be addictive in the same way. And that’s what causes us to addictively check our phones, or keep posting on social media. Sometimes when we check our phones, we get something nice: such as likes from people we know, or free rewards, and other times we get nothing. In a similar vein to Skinner’s pigeons, it’s the randomness that keeps us addicted.

“There are only two industries that call their customers ‘users’: illegal drugs and software,” as Edward Tufte put it.

Targeting Your Psychology

On top of their general framework, social media apps waste your time by appealing to your interests. During the documentary, tech experts, such as the mathematician and data scientist Cathy O’Neil, give us insight into how exactly they do it.

According to O’Neil, these websites collect information about your browser history. Every time you log on, they track everything about your user journey. They record what makes you stop, what captures your attention, what you like, and how long you spend on certain posts.

People assume when they use technology within the comfort of their own home, that everything they do is private. That’s not the case: companies like Google, Facebook and X track much of what you do on their platforms.

They then use that information against you. According to Justin Rosenstein (co-creator of Facebook’s Like button and co-founder of Asana) these tech giants have developed algorithms that use this data to target and control your user journey. They do so by:

• Creating a curated Facebook, X or Instagram feed, especially for you.
• Using that feed to exclusively present you with content that grabs your attention and keeps you watching.

We know very little about the technicalities behind how these algorithms work. But we do know one thing: they were created with one purpose in mind, to target your interests and keep us using their products for as long as possible.

On top of your user journey, these algorithms use information about your demographic, to make assumptions about how people similar to you might think. It’s why, according to Tristan Harris, when you go to Google and type in “Climate Change is” you’re going to see different results depending on where you live, and the things Google knows about your interests.

In short, Google knows what they need to suggest, or present to you, to capture your attention. And they are doing just that.

Harris calls this business tactic “The Attention Extraction Model,” because it has one goal in mind: to keep our focus. It may be a good business tactic, but it’s not how we should be living our lives, or treating others.

“The attention extraction model is not how we want to treat human beings.” (Tristan Harris)

Down the Rabbit Hole of Wasted Time

Have you ever been scrolling through Facebook, watched a video, and then had another one suggested to you? It’s happened to me, too. And after watching that suggested video, I’ll get suggested another and watch it.

Next thing I know, I’ve wasted an hour watching videos I didn’t even want to.

In the Social Dilemma, ex-Google engineer Guillaume Chaslot calls this feature of websites a rabbit hole, because it’s very easy to fall into one and get lost. When that happens, you get so caught up in the content in front of you, that you forget there’s a way out.

Once they’ve captured your attention, tech giants use these rabbit holes, to keep you there for as long as possible.

Monetizing Our Attention

I’m sure you’re wondering why tech giants are targeting your attention. And, according to Tim Kendall, the answer is simple.

As ex-head of monetization at Facebook, he needed to create a business model that didn’t deter users from using their platform, but at the same time, capitalized on the audience they had.

Because of that, they opted for an ad-based model. Because users don’t pay for the service, they perceive the platform as “free to use.”

Having an ad-based system requires these websites to maintain their users’ attention for as long as possible. Because the longer they keep you, the more ads you watch, and the more money they make.

Without you even realizing it, the websites we use every day have found a way to monetize our attention. You’re not paying in money, you’re paying in time, and these tech companies are doing everything they can to make you keep paying.

After all, in the words of Harris

“If you are not paying for the product, then you are the product.”

Worse still, these platforms don’t care whether what you are seeing is actually true, they just want you to keep watching. And since, according to an MIT study, false news spreads faster than true news on Twitter, users like us are repeatedly lured in and trapped by:

• Clickbait titles.
• Misinformation.
• Pointless and trivial content.

And the feeds keep you watching it for hours a day, because that makes the tech giants more money.

Real-Life Impact

Let’s recap. Tech firms don’t care whether what they show you is correct. Instead, they present you with information that will interest and appeal to you. And, to make as much money as possible, they allow companies to pay and target ads towards your interests.

Beyond a personal level, the documentary argues that this business model has real-life consequences: feeds that show people more of what they already believe, and misinformation that spreads faster than the corrections.

Solutions to Take Back Control

The underlying message of “The Social Dilemma” is clear. If you let them, websites like Facebook, Google and X will pull you in, and waste as much of your time as they possibly can.

The documentary rounds off by offering several ways you can avoid misinformation, clickbait titles, and hours of pointless scrolling. Doing so will allow you to take back control of your day to day habits.

Use Online Tools Wisely

We’ve been using these types of technology for years now. They’ve become a part of our day to day lives. As a result, it’s unrealistic to expect us to give them up completely. But, if you are using these websites and apps, there are a few things you can do to avoid falling to their deceitful ways.

Harris offers a few tips:

• Turn off your notifications. Social media algorithms ping you a notification at a time that’s most likely to catch your attention. And that could leave you procrastinating and wasting hours watching clickbait videos.
• Don’t use Google Search. Instead, use a search engine that doesn’t use your data to manipulate you. Harris uses Qwant.
• Never accept a video recommended for you. On YouTube, Facebook, or anywhere. Instead of relying on algorithms and falling victim to social media rabbit holes, make your own decisions on what content to watch.

Following these steps can help you avoid wasting hours on social media apps, and protect you from the misinformation and clickbait they promote.

Avoid Time Eaters Altogether

If you lack the self-control to regulate and control your time on these platforms, you need to avoid them altogether. During the documentary, Former Pinterest President Tim Kendall, stated that he programmed a piece of blocking software to prevent him from ever using those apps.

Kendall’s software isn’t publicly available, but FocusMe does the same job: it blocks the apps and websites you choose, on Windows, Mac, Linux, Android and iPhone, so you can take back control of your time.

Final Thoughts

The Social Dilemma reveals insider information on how social media apps are created, and how tech giants are reverse engineering our psychology to manipulate us.

It has told us that these websites use our own habits to try and keep us on their website for as long as possible. They don’t care whether the content we see is true, they only care which content results in more ad revenue.

“How much of your life can we get you to give us?”

Knowing this, we can now use the tools and advice from Tristan Harris to better protect our time.

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