Today, I finally hit my breaking point with a friend. For nearly two months, we’ve spent hours discussing how he can better market himself and his product. But most of the time was spent discussing his fear of failure, his insecurities, and his lack of time to get his business rolling.
I tried to help and spent a lot of time to motivate him. The problem with motivation sometimes is that it’s not concrete.
It pumps you up…and that’s it.
For those who are already pushing themselves and building their art or business will benefit from the short-term motivational boost, but people who haven’t started or who don’t have any idea what they want, I’m skeptical as to whether “you can live your dreams, go for it!” type neurolinguistic-programming (NLP) actually has any worth in and of itself.
Motivation is a means, not an end, in and of itself. You use motivation to propel yourself towards a goal, but without action and the execution of steps that build the goal, it’s worthless dopamine.
Now, let me introduce you to a motivational speaker who does know what he’s talking about. Jim Rohn.
He was a salesman before he entered the business of motivation. Then he became a millionaire working with AbundaVita, a nutritional supplement company. He sold a product, and learned the mechanics of success through sales.
And one of Jim’s biggest stresses is on proper habits. Habits that help you focus. But to have proper habits, you need to eliminate improper habits. Unskillful life applications.
What habit was keeping my friend from focusing? From being productive?
I realized it one day when I took a closer look at his tone and body language.
It wasn’t fear.
It wasn’t stupidity.
It was arrogance.
Suddenly, everything clicked. I realized that every time I’d give him advice, he’d argue with me. “Well, no, Hector, it’s not like that…” or “No, Hector, I don’t think that will work…”
I snapped. “Dude, you’re not seeing any success, because you’re not even trying. And why are you not trying? Because you think the market needs to cater to your desires. You think some opportunity is going to knock on your door and you’ll have the business you want and the life you want. Well, it’s not going to. And it’s because you’re arrogant.”
Annihilating Arrogance and Attracting Success
In the following video, Jim explains the importance of attracting success.
You attract success by opening yourself to success.
Well, opening yourself is about eliminating blockages. Removing obstacles.
Around the seven-minute mark of the video, Jim talks about costing yourself customers, investors, or employees who would gladly join you or buy from you, but don’t because there’s a difficulty in dealing with you. An obstacle.
His advice to become ultra-conservative and eliminate as many bad habits or behaviors that might interfere with a business opportunity.
When you go to talk to a farmer, don’t wear a suit. He won’t take you seriously.
Know your market, and then check your dress, your attitude, your behavior, your language, and your habits.
Eliminate any that might hurt you in that market.
For my friend, his primary obstacle was his arrogance.
He thought he knew why he was failing, but he didn’t. He wasn’t seeing success, because he wasn’t taking advice from someone who did know why he was failing.
Eliminate arrogance, pretend you don’t know what you’re talking (because if you did, you’d be good at what you do and probably making money doing it), and you’ll open yourself to success.
Around the eleven-minute mark of the video, Jim talks about sincerity.
“Are you actually trying?” is essentially the question.
It’s fine if they reject you because they don’t like what you have to say. Or because they disagree with what you believe in. Maybe your writing offends them. Perhaps your product isn’t the brand they’re loyal to.
But were you sincere about your presentation? Did you believe in the product you were selling?
Do you say what you mean and mean what you say? As long as you’re sincere and genuine with the time you spend and what you do, nobody can fault you for it.
Excuses are arrogance.
That’s right, excuses are arrogant.
You’re being arrogant, because you’re under the assumption that you can fool yourself and others.
“Oh, I don’t have time. You see, I have all these things to do…”
Your buddies will nod, but as the years go on, they’ll being to wonder in the back of their head, “He says he doesn’t have time, but he’s been talking about this book, this business, and his dreams for years, but he hasn’t done anything about it.”
They’ll eventually realize you’re all talk
This happens all the time: I see people post some picture of a yacht, or a beach, or a beautiful woman.
“I wish I could have that, I wish I could be there, I wish I could date someone like that.”
But do they do anything about it.
And what’s worse, is that they suffer. And they may not even know why, but the subconscious from which their anxiety and stress comes from knows the truth. The deep mind – that mind that is always aware – is never fooled; it knows the truth.
The only thing being fooled is your thinking. Your rationalizations. Your fantasies about what you think your story is, and why your story isn’t the same as your dream.
How Serious Are You?
Want to see how honest you are about succeeding? Fine.
The single best productivity application on the market.
It’ll help you limit those bad habits that are limiting your time. And, yes, you do have habits that are sucking your time. You spend too much time watching TV, checking your phone, Facebook, or reading through emails.
Don’t lie to me. Don’t lie to yourself.
And once you stop lying to yourself and others, you will leave yourself open to success.
See you at the top,